a word from Georges Le Soq

I am eating my lunchtime falafal sandwich and pineapple and there are calls from the back yard.
It sounds French.
"Mon ami, mon ami! Monnnnnnnnnnnnn ami!!!!!" and I look out the window and Georges Le Soq, my rotten French sock monkey is out there in the sun.
"Mon ami, ees no civilized, dis yard" he tells me. And I am like
"oh really, are you gonna cut the lawn???" and he gives me that nasty withering look the French are born with, the kind that makes you realize you are indeed an ugly American and he tells me
"Mon ami" he patiently explains "I am too small, and OUI, too busy".
I never ask what he is busy doing, because it is obvious, what with the tanning lotion, shades, towel and the fact that he is NEWD. You know the French, they have continental ideas about public newdity.

Speaking of which, the wife here jokes that she is the only woman in the village who doesn't have to cut the grass (or do the dishes or make the cookies or scrub the john, those being some of the jobs of THIS kept man). I remember, for example, this time last year our neighbor ***** was 8 months pregnant and would cut the grass in her BIKINI, yes, BIKINI, big healthy pregnant belly, tattoos and all, and you could always tell that the UPS man, garbage man and various other truckers hadn't seen that sight before when they slowed down to get a better look at her....

Anyway, I endeavor to get a couple of pics before I cut the lawn for the first time this year, and I have in mind this arty looking shot through the dandelions looking at the house, and lookit who is there in front of me! One of those miracles, there you are taking pictures, and somebody gets murdered in front of you, or you see an albino tiger or a pretty sunset, and SNAP, you got photo of the year. I swear this guy was always just a few feet in front of the mower as I cut, trying to get a sip from each doomed dandelion.