guac and ROLL...

OK, I am the ONLY AMERICAN and also the ONLY VEGETARIAN who has never made guacamole, can you believe it? I order it on my burritos, I eat it at people's houses, the wife tells me it does NOT have to be expensive and it can be a lot more tasty to make yourself. My old pal Judy Gallow proves that, she just looks at an avocado and it begs for mercy and becomes this DELISH dish under her knife.....and Judy told me how she does it. And the wife? She told me how SHE does it. So, its my turn. I figure: "do it the way they BOTH would do it. MOREMOREMORE!"

OK, I had this bag of sale chips and no plans. 1.69 for green mtn. gringo, those long tasty tortilla strips, YUMMO. I knew I had to get some cilantro to make the guac Judy style...so I figured with fresh cilantro coming out my ears, I should do all that Tex-Mex American crapola and make refried black beans and salsa with my first EVER guac....I mean, you are making a mess on the cutting board and grinding up jalapenos and garlic and dicing onions, why not just GO THE WHOLE HOG? Mighty easy overall, realllly easy.

(inspiring, btw, me to think I outta make Godzilla chip and dip bowls, believe me!)

Gary's new guac recipe (combo of the wife's and Judy Gallow's guacs)

-skin, gut and chop an avocado into a bowl

-dice or use mini chopper or food processor to whir some garlic and toss in with avocado

-pour in some lime juice...I think I mistakenly added DOUBLE, like 3 tbs or more...does it really matter? I think not....

-use scissors to chop finely some fresh cilantro and stir in

-dice some tomatoes and add

-I use little or no salt in cooking, because, for example, now you stir in as much TABASCO as you can stand, or as the wife says, until your tongue SINGS

---mash all that in the bowl, ready to EAT, easy peasy for real!

Judy Gallow's incredible salsa

--use your mini-chopper or dice a jalapeno, put in bowl

--dice into little bits one pound or 2 cups tomato

--finely dice and add a half onion, garlic too

--at least 2 tbs. chopped cilantro

--2 teaspoons lime juice, but I prob. add more

--what the heck, add some TABASCO rather than salt

--stir all that and EAT

I love refried beans, and you can never mess it up, but this is a good start, then add other stuff if you want

Gary's wicked EASY refried black beans

--saute half or full bell pepper with half onion or more and some garlic for several minutes

--drain 14-16 oz. can diced tomatoes or chop some fresh, add

--drain and rinse 28 oz. can black beans and add

--add at least 2 tbs. lime juice, cumin, black pepper, oregano, and what the heck, TABASCO instead of salt, and throw in other stuff if you feel like it, such as leftover cilantro from above or whatevs

--stir and simmer covered on low-med until it is mushy and pasty, several minutes, but simmering longer is even better, just stir occaisionally

(stoppered bottle by Gary Rith)

Listen, see the bottle above? See the beer bottle on the counter below? Meesh was explaining last week that Jeff Brown, an old potter friend of mine, had been approached by a micro-brew beer company about making growlers, ie., large stoppered beer bottles. I think the micro-brew company were hoping for cheapo crap prices, like from factories overseas, not handmade in the USA by an artist, but Jeff was interested in the idea so he started making some. He is ordering parts from England, I think, the stoppers, and shipping may cost more than the stoppers! A mutual potter friend Ron Philbeck was like "buy Gr0lsch beers with the stoppers, and pull it off and use THAT! Then you get the beer too, with a free stopper!" which is BRILLIANT, so I literally ran out the door and brought Gr0lsch, which is a tasty item with guac....anyway, what you see here is my bottle, just outta the kiln. There is a red printed label on top of the stopper, but I easily got it off with my scrubber sponge...groovy eh? It is a bit of a challenge, getting used to making a special pair of holes in the right spot for the stopper, but all part of the fun in figuring this out....

Good for holding salad dressing, vinegar or oil.....