people gettin' down, people gettin' CRAZY

I had a little chat with my cat Spike, who is, as you know, super smart.
"SPIKE!" sez I and he lifts a sleepy eye my direction and responds
"???????" and I get up close, so that I have his full attention and ask
"Spike, I have a couple of questions, is this a good time?" and he is like
"I am famished, tuna first, questions later" and I pass out the tuna and after he eats he goes into the cat box and produces something terribly smelly, comes out and shakes himself, settles onto a sunny windowsill and sez
"I am all your yours".
"OK Spike, first thing. I am gonna be recorded for a TV show Thursday afternoon. Last time I was on TV I wore a jacket and tie and looked pretty sharp, although when I watched the clip later I noticed I had never combed my hair. C'est la vie!"
"C'est la vie indeed. Par for the course with you. What is your point?"
"Well Spike, what should I wear this time? I think they will pat on some makeup but for the rest I am on my own. Jacket and tie again? I am not in the mood to do that this year, plus what potter goes around in a jacket and tie? Nice button down shirt? Ratty old flannel shirt? Sweater???? TEE????????"
"Go with your cat and crossbones black tee. They'll all think you're a BADAZZ HOHOHO!"
"Ha! Very funny. I'll think about it Spike. Next question, OK?"
"?????"
"Spike what should I do about dinner? I made that pizza last night and it ROCKED. I am a day late with getting to the store and cannot go 'cause the kiln is on, whaddya think I should make for dinnah?"
"Simple. Take a big pot and dump in all the odds and ends from the fridge into the pot and simmer it and say its chili. Pass out some wine beforehand and some hot sauce and you'll all be happy"