WRITE TO ME! firstname.lastname@example.org Come see me! Gallery 41 Owego, NY August 3 and 17 . Ithaca Artist market July 26. Cooperstown Art Association "Earth, Wind, Fire" New York Invitational August 22-Sept 20.. Six Mile Creek Winery Harvest Fest September 13. All material on this blog unless stated otherwise is copyright Gary Edward Rith 2013-2014
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
A tasty human being
I have to admit a thing or 2: I am not really into dragons and sh!t. Dragons have their place, but I really prefer cheesy, campy, destructive and awesome Godzilla and crappy B movie science fiction and toys from my childhood (see Beastie Boys video below, that is what I mean--they have the same inspiration). It is different, liking that stuff for a laugh and its aesthetic humor, compared to loving fantasy.
You know I have made a lot of monsters lately, but last Sunday night I was falling asleep, and you know this is why there is paper at the bedside: I start laughing, wake up, and tell the wife
"what if Godzilla was holding a bowl full of people to snack upon, like doritos????" and I doodled it out, as you see below. The appeal, to me as a potter and sculptor, is making a tiny little bowl on the wheel, as I would any other bowl, and incorporating it...hilarious indeed!
Last night I was like
"monsters having a teaparty???"
(pottery and sketch by Gary Rith)
Monday, January 30, 2012
Speaking of awesome Irish Americans, loooove Dropkick Murphys...this live clip in Bahston has all these women dancing onstage...my niece has been a student at Hahvad these last few years, and looking on stage here, you are like..."is that.....?"....but maybe not, all young women look the same anyhow.....
Had a glaze firing Sunday, this is the before and after on top...looking pretty good....
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Saturday, January 28, 2012
The wife is the opposite---she reads directions, files papers, all that, and she is, amongst other things, a bookeeper. Her job is perfect for her (she'd kill me if I gave too many details so I won't) but she is an academic administrator who juggles all the balls at the circus. Well, maybe she juggles porcupines, sharp axes and knives, flaming torches, chainsaws and babies...all at once. She handles it. She also, GOD BLESS HER, handles my tax and business paperwork (see above "bookeeper"). How lucky is that, I have a business, I am incompetent at business, and she juggles babies and chainsaws all day then comes home and juggles my porcupines and flaming torches???? LUCKY ME!
Anyhow, some of this sh!t I have to do myself. The photo below is a project I have worked on for months, 3 entries for the international small teapot competition. The easy part was making 3 amazing teapots. Filling out the goldarn form online? Sheesh. I mean, filled it out, it went blank. Filled it out again, it went blank. FIVE TIMES to mounting anxiety, i mean, you worry that your credit card number or whatever is floating around out there, just waiting for the Russian mob to snatch it and start ordering Adidas from zappos for every criminal in Minsk.
Anyway, it is NOT resolved, this should-be-simple application form, but the friendly dude I called who is running it is trying to be helpful...and he tells me he hears from artists every day saying the form sux and won't work. Crapola. No wonder I hate paperwork.
I congratulated myself the other day. NY state sales tax decided they needed to know EVERYTHING about me in order for me to keep doing business in the state. A multipage thing (I file sales tax in Vermont each year too: one little slip of paper with five lines...NY has to do it the most complicated way possible...a lot of people live in Albany and need jobs and all of them were probably bullied in school and look for ways to get back at the world...through messes of paperwork).
Anyway, multi-page forms, first question was "how many people involved in your business?" and i was like TWO. There is me, then there is the wife (see above "bookeeper"). I mean, the info they wanted, my shoe size, waist size, favorite peanut butter, do I like my toothbrush with soft bristles or firmer? Paper or plastic? How about pillows, speaking of softer or firmer, and if I drink yuppie coffee, do I brew it myself or waste money at starshmucks? OK, I fill all this crapola in, 8 pages or more of bank accts, ss numbers and horrible questions....then they want me to do it again.....for the wife. Just between you and me? I went back to page one and changed the 2 people to ONE person. Only I work for this business anymore ;) I retired my wife (see above "bookeeper").
Lastly, and I think this is REALLY funny:
1) on 2 different days this week, young women looking for writing work contacted me asking if they could be hired to WRITE THIS BLOG for me. Cracks me up, because I have written this blog at least once daily for nearly 6 years, thousands of posts, obviously I am having fun and like to do it myself...what kind of idiot hires somebody to write their feckin' blog for them????? I s'pose fake blogs, like Kardashians or politicians. I mean, i earn less than a starschmucks barista, could I be earning big bucks by writing other people's blog posts? Holy cats, am I in the wrong damn business?????????? (see above "bookeeper")
2) I listed a teapot for 34 bucks the other morning, it is awesome (with a skull!) and that same day a lady wrote to ask me to cut shipping on a bunny teapot...which is the exact same size and effort, and priced at 26 bucks plus shipping, in other words, comparitively a GREAT DEAL. Does anybody realize what shipping costs, plus etsy and credit card fees, plus the packing and shipping? I mean, you just charge a fee to cover those set things like postage and all, and you just pack things. I earn less than a barista as I say above, but do people go into Walmart and argue they won't pay sales tax????? It is the exact same thing and really pisses me off when somebody asks for a discount: MY PRICES ARE ALREADY AS LOW AS POSSIBLE and besides, am I making you buy something from me? Is this like, you are dying of thirst and I charge you 100 bucks for a glass of water? Sorry, but please, either buy it or don't buy it, I am doing the best I can, please respect the artist and the very low paid work they do (see above, "bookeeper" and "barista"---I have noticed, btw, that some friends have lowered their shipping fees on their pots---because the customers may have complained, and all the potter can do is lower the shipping price and raise the item price...so in the case of the bunny teapot, I would be happy to lower the shipping price, but the teapot is no longer 26, I could make it 34 like the skull teapot......)
Final thought: each one of the 3 teapots below is the same size as either the 34 dollar skull teapot or the 26 dollar bunny teapot, but EACH will be priced at 100+ dollars.... EACH...just to give you some perspective....
(pottery by Gary Rith)
Friday, January 27, 2012
(coolio monster teapot, eh wot????)
(Thanks PETE! for getting the ball rolling, it has been so much fun to try)
(pottery by Gary Rith)
Thursday, January 26, 2012
OK, chapter 3, one fact and one dream please go to comments and share yours!!!!!! Here is mine today:
One fact--we have not had a lot of sun, but holy cats, maybe the most mild January I have ever seen in my life? YESSSSSssssss.
If you look at a post or 2 down, you would think I am DREAMING OF WOMEN's boots (NO, I do not have a boots f3tish...really! HONEST! There is another fact, even though they look soooo tasty!)
OK, anyway, like I was saying, the wife, speaking of boots, is on the road Saturday, and I am dreaming of a JAMES BOND DAY....like, ten hours of Connery, Moore, Bond Babes and villians.....
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
The wife will be like
"GAWD! Why do you have to spread my business all over the interwebs??? WITH PHOTOS!" and I will smile that sweet smile, the one that tells her
"I am just a little puppy...you wouldn't yell at a wittle puppy would you???"
OK, it went like this. You see my gal here at the end of the day. First thing, I walk her early to the bus stop with the dog, and say
"au revoir mon petit bonne fille!" or something like that, i don't know French, but that doesn't stop me speaking French, and Jay, our awesome neighbor also at the bus stop is like "oh, you just told her....goodbye my pretty gal!". Something like that. She was wearing her petite beret (or Tam!) Judy knit her last month, and the French coat she traded for on Friday. Long story, about trading for the coat, but Lucy was like
"It belonged to a tiny little French woman...OH! it fits you perfectly!" which is how the wife ended up with this nice wool coat, and it is also why I was speaking "French" at the bus stop.
ANYWAYS, so I myself am sneaking around downtown today...I saw sale signs down there, winter merchandise on sale...and I was like "I want me some boots!". And where, sure, some of the sale boots had their merits, nothing was working, BUT I got me 2 belts for nearly nothing. Keeping my pants UP is a challenge, so I got a brown and a black one....and OHMYGOD lookit the black boots here. For ladies. It was not until I was 40 I suddenly realized I have a BOOT F3TISH. Not really, but my long legged gal looks good in boots. And I saw these kickass engineers boots for ladies...half price! 2 sizes left! One of them maybe the wife's size??????????????????????
YES :) They are hers now......
I am applying for a show of my wall pieces, which has opened the floodgates of ideas, yaaaaay!
(new sculpture by Gary Rith)
I don't know why my photos come up this big. More for you to enjoy!
Anyway, I was there falling asleep the other night, but had an idea, as you do, and was laughing and asked the wife to pass paper and pencil
"haha!" sez I
"what?" sez she
"tee hee, what if Godzilla had a bowl and was eating people out of it?" and she is like
So, yeah, I made it, and you see the sketch below, and what happened when I got started: I made one standing on a car, the other holding a real (small) bowl with people to snack upon....
also a berry bowl and an apparently good before and after glaze firing!
Happy day to you!
Monday, January 23, 2012
(new wall piece by Gary Rith, about 3 inches wide, 3 inches tall)
You have to tread carefully in this world. You don't copy things. But I have to admit, I have always found that picture below and the fish in the teapot extremely amusing, you know? In my work above the wife is like
"exquisite, the little lid for the teapot!"
Sunday, January 22, 2012
(new teapot by Gary Rith--I kinda threw everything into that one except the kitchen sink...)
Saturday, January 21, 2012
- ► 2014 (202)
- ► 2013 (366)
- when pottery meets BLACK COMEDY
- getting ready for St. Pat's.....
- new work :)
- when dog lovers come over.....
- bureauOcratic nightmares
- yin and yang dog and kitteh....
- so, I was talkin' with PETE just the other day and...
- one fact and one dream, chapter 3: we need YOU to...
- beauty and the beast....being both rude...and swee...
- the most s3xy hawt thing you have ever seen in you...
- "at least he eats them head first"
- through the fog....
- teddy bears and hearts: awwwwwwwwwww.....
- hey! is that inspired by.....
- potters work in their pajamas....
- POP! It gets all shiny and bright: the before, du...
- Red Jewels!!!!
- G0dzilla .....
- NEED YOUR INPUT: one fact and one dream: chapter 3...
- Fu Manchu Cat strikes again: the haiku!
- dragon mug, go for it!
- One fact and a dream, chapter 2: we need your inp...
- Teddy bears and Godzilla: the cure for the jingly...
- jingly jangly...
- some of them love snow.....
- Friday the 13th is "beginning to look a lot like C...
- Christi has something to say....
- one fact and one dream: chapter ONE, and we need Y...
- Winnie and Rumpole go international
- people and their kinky requests.....
- reader's poll: thousands of years ago cats were w...
- dogs in the wilds....
- lions and tigers and BEARS...and hippos and anothe...
- NEW reader's poll:
- go with the MASHED POTATO BURRITO
- reader's poll!!!!
- dragon mug! for YOU
- the first time...
- "....white wedding...." and boring the heck out of...
- SANTA strikes again!!!!
- the amazing shopping trip, part one: us at the gr...
- new (filthy) resolutions!
- "twenty twelve: twenty eleven kicked ass and you h...
- ▼ January (44)
- ► 2011 (413)
- ► 2010 (616)